


Time for Reconnecting

by Rivermoon1970



Series: Time and Again [13]
Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Abandonment, Dysfunctional Family, Family Secrets, Father issues, Father-Son Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, Love, M/M, Male Slash, Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-11
Updated: 2015-02-11
Packaged: 2018-03-11 22:45:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3335579
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rivermoon1970/pseuds/Rivermoon1970
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Spencer had a recurring dream about a young boy named Riley Jenkins.  This puts him on the path to searching out the father that abandoned him over 17 years prior.  He now has to deal with all of the pain and anger that was churned up not only from the case, but from seeing his father after all those years.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Time for Reconnecting

_Now_

Spencer woke-up to the sounds of cooking, but he didn’t get out of bed right away. He laid there not moving, not wanting to move and just stared up at the ceiling. Aaron, I miss you Aaron, I need you so much, I need you to help me. I think I’m going crazy without you. I saw Gideon. Why him? Why didn’t I see you? I would give anything to see you at least one more time. I love you Aaron, I love you. Silent tears flowed as these thoughts ran through his head as he heard Jack helping to get Sasha up. She was still home for a couple of more days from school and Jack had taken a short bereavement leave from college so that he could be there for his sister and Spencer. 

Spencer heard a knock on the door but he didn’t turn to look, “Reid, come on man you gotta get up. You need to get up and eat something Reid”.

“I don’t want to get up Morgan,” Spencer said as he stared at the ceiling.

Morgan sighed deeply. He knew the crash was coming, had seen it coming after the funeral the day before. Spencer had been running on empty for three weeks now, barely keeping it together to help Sasha and to plan the funeral. Now, now when it was all over with nothing to plan and Jack here to take care of Sasha, the crash hit and it worried Morgan.

“Kid, you gotta get up now”. 

“Why? Why do I need to get up? Why do I need to keep going? Huh Morgan?” Spencer was angry, angry that for the second time in his life the person he loved most was taken from him.

Derek moved into the room and sat on the bed next to Spencer, “Spencer, you need to get up because you have a daughter who needs you. If not for yourself you need to pull yourself together for her”.

Spencer rolled onto his side and put his head on Morgan’s lap, being friends as long as they had he felt like it was okay. It wasn’t unlike times on the plane when his head would drop on Morgan’s shoulder in sleep. To Spencer, Morgan would always be like a brother to him. 

Morgan laid a hand on Spencer’s shoulder and squeezed, he tried to convey the love he felt for the younger man. “I can’t even imagine how hard this is for you Spencer. I know we say this all the time and it never seems adequate but man I am so sorry for your loss. But, I miss him too Reid. I miss arguing with him, going to him with questions, hearing him tell me what a good job I’m doing with the team”. Morgan had to swallow past the lump in his throat as he saw his best friend shedding silent tears, “You know that even after I became Unit Chief I still saw us as his team. Even after JJ left and Rossi left, when Ashley decided to come back, it still felt like Aaron’s team”. He patted Spencer on the shoulder. “Kid, he impacted a lot of lives and inspired a lot of people, we all feel the loss”.

Spencer was openly crying, as if he hadn’t cried enough the day before. He felt like that was all he was going to do for the rest of his life, miss Aaron and cry at the thought that he’d have to go the rest of his life without him. 

Morgan squeezed his shoulder again, laid his head back on the headboard and closed his eyes. He wished he knew how to help his friend, but he knew that this was going to be a long time before Spencer was able to let go.

Just then Jack came in the room and saw Morgan with Spencer. At first he was going to back out and leave them, but he knew he had to help somehow.

“Papa, Sasha’s asking for you. She needs to see you up”. When Spencer didn’t respond, he came over to the bed and sat opposite Morgan, but facing Spencer. “I’m going to be transferring schools this next semester”. He said very matter-of-fact and the frown he wore was so like Aaron’s that Spencer actually smiled a tiny smile.

“Why are you doing that Jack? You’re almost done…”

“Because you and Sasha need me. I’ve already looked into it and have spoken with my professors. They’ve already written letters of recommendation so I can pursue my MA when I graduate. It won’t be hard and I’ve already applied to Marymount, Southeastern and Georgetown”.

Spencer sat up and took Jack’s hand, “Are you sure Jack? We’ll be okay…”

“No Papa, you’re not okay and I want to be here for you. I couldn’t really help Dad when my Mom died, but I can help you. Please, let me?”

Spencer laid a hand on Jack’s cheek and lightly patted it. “Okay Jack…Okay”. Spencer then got up and made his way into the bathroom to take a shower and get ready for the day before him. 

“Uncle Derek…”

“One day at a time kiddo, one day at a time”.  
_____________________________________________________________________________________   
_Then_

_Garcia: Reid, we’ve been all up in your father’s business._

_Reid: What’d you find?_

_Garcia: Let me tell you first what I did not find, no kiddie porn, no membership to elicit websites, no dubious e-mails, no chatroom history._

_Reid: What about his finances?_

_Hotch: We went back ten years no questionable transactions that we could find.  
Prentiss: Well he did buy a ticket to see Celine Dion six months ago, but I think we can over look that. [looks to the side and shrugs sarcastically]_

_Reid: He’s smart is it possible he kept things under the table?_

_Hotch: Well of course but from what we can tell Reid he doesn’t fit the profile._

_Prentiss: We can tell you other things about him if you want to know._

_Reid: [shakes his head slightly] I’m listening_

_Prentiss: He’s a workaholic, he actually logs more hours than we do, he makes decent money but he doesn’t spend a lot of it, he has a modest house, he drives a hybrid, he doesn’t travel much, he stays away from the casinos, um and according to his veterinary bills he has a very sick cat._

_Hotch: He appears to spend most of his free time alone, he goes to the movies a lot and he reads. And from his collection of first editions it seems his favorite author is ah..._

_Reid: Isaac Asimov, I remember that one_

_Garcia: He does have one other major interest on his home computer he’s archived like a gagillion things on one common subject._

_Reid: What?_

_Garcia: [smiling] You kiddo he’s got like everything that’s been published online every article you’ve ever been quoted in pieces you’ve written for Behavioral Science journals he even has a copy of your dissertation._

_Rossi: He’s keeping tabs on you, that’s saying something_

_Reid: Yeah, that he googled me, like that makes up for everything, I’m going to get some air._

Reid walked out of the casino so he could get some distance and clear his head. After walking for a few minutes his personal cell phone rang.

“Yeah,” He said rather abruptly.

“Spencer, it’s me. Talk to me, what’s really going on in your head?”

He stopped for a moment, closed his eyes and breathed deep, “Aaron, he lived less than nine miles from me this whole time. I just don’t understand, why? Why couldn’t he come see me?” He frowned deeply as he thought of all the years he was alone and tried to take care of a schizophrenic mother by himself.

“I can’t give you those answers Spence. Only he can, but this isn’t the way. From everything we’ve gone through your father doesn’t fit the profile of a child molester and murderer. Look just come home and try to put this behind you”. Aaron didn’t know how to help. He had wanted to stay behind, but he couldn’t because he needed to finish the reports on the Bridges kidnapping as well as other responsibilities as Unit Chief. “I’m sorry I couldn’t stay Spencer...”

Spencer breathed in and out for a minute as he tried to get his emotions under control. A part of him had wanted Aaron to stay, but he knew he had to get back home to Virginia, “Aaron, it’s okay, really. Look I know you don’t understand, but I need to see this through. I don’t know how my father’s involved, but he’s involved and I just...I need to know Aaron”. Reid was practically begging for his partner to understand the need for him to know the truth.

“Okay, okay. I understand, but Reid, I think you need to really listen to Morgan and Dave. Gary Michaels fits the profile much better”.

Spencer heard what Aaron was trying to tell him, but his judgment was clouded. His anger at his father was making him lose objectivity. “Fine,” He let out a frustrated sigh, “Aaron...thank you”.

“For what?” Aaron thought he knew but he waited to hear it from Reid.

“For helping me with this, for letting me try to work this out. I know I’m taking up...”

“Spencer, stop. This was obviously affecting you. I can give you a little more leeway, but Reid,”

“Yeah?”

“You do need to get this wrapped up quickly, okay? I need you guys back here. I need you back here”.

Spencer smiled for the first time that day, “Okay Hotch, and for what it’s worth, I need you too. Love you”.

Aaron smiled into the phone wishing he could take away all of the pain from Spencer’s father’s abandonment, but he couldn’t. He had to let Spencer work this out on his own, what he could give him was love and understanding. “I love you too, hurry back”. Aaron hung up and Spencer felt a little better.

Spencer went back inside and Morgan and Rossi found him playing video poker and getting hit on by a high-end prostitute. The next couple of days were a flurry of activity and finally Spencer had the whole story. His mother had been there the night that Lou Jenkins killed Gary Michaels. His father figured out where she was and how he tried to protect her, but the weight of that knowledge had driven a wedge between Spencer’s parents and his father couldn’t stay. 

Spencer and his father made a few steps toward reconciliation. But he wasn’t quite ready to forgive his father, but the initial steps had been taken. While on the way home he, Rossi and Morgan found out about JJ going into labor and as soon as they landed Spencer quickly made his way to the hospital. As soon as he walked into JJ’s room and saw Aaron, then JJ he was able to finally settle. Aaron pulled him into a hug before he let him go to JJ.

“I just went through fifteen hours of labor yet you look worse than I do”.

“Don’t be ridiculous, you look beautiful”. He stared at JJ watching her with her son and felt happy and yet a little melancholy at the same time. It brought all those memories to the surface, but he pushed them down for the time being. 

JJ’s boyfriend Will got everyone out of the room so that Spencer and JJ could have a few minutes alone. She had asked Spencer to be Henry’s godfather and Spencer felt so honored. When he took the just hour’s old infant in his arms he was moved beyond tears. He now had two children in his life that he would do anything to protect.

“So Spencer, if anything ever happens to Will or I it will be your job to make sure he gets into Yale”.

“Yale, Yale that was your Godfather’s safety school. I can get you into CalTech with just one phone call”. He smiled down at the child and a sudden peace settled in his heart. 

Just then Aaron came back in to check on JJ and Spencer and smiled. He had only ever seen Spencer with Jack but seeing him hold the baby just made his heart stop. It was a picture he’d hold in his mind for the rest of their lives.

“Hey,” Aaron approached his lover and laid a hand on his arm.

Spencer looked up and the smile on his face made Aaron’s heart flutter, “Why don’t we let JJ rest. We can come back tomorrow and visit, that is if you want visitors?”

JJ smiled, “Of course. They will probably discharge us the next day, but you should go home and get some rest”.

In a rare display of affection outside of Aaron, he leaned down and hugged JJ. He and Aaron then left, but because they had two cars they made their way home separately. Spencer’s thoughts were a dizzying mess as he thought about the last few days. Being in Vegas, saving the Bridges boy, then everything after made him question his own childhood and the unresolved anger he harbored towards his father.

When he finally walked in the door Aaron launched himself off the couch where he’d been reading and went over and took Spencer in his arms and kissed him softly. He heard the slight hum coming from his lover and he deepened the kiss. His right arm went around Spencer’s waist as his left snaked its way up to caress the back of the young agents head. Aaron changed the angle of the kiss after a minute and Spencer just couldn’t think anymore. Finally his arms went around Aaron and he started to caress his back as one arm wandered down to the older man’s ass and pulled his lover in tight. 

“Hmmm, let’s take this into the bedroom,” Spencer smiled and pulled his Unit Chief along. Suddenly, as soon as they entered, Spencer turned and was all over Aaron, he pulled Aaron’s shirt off him and flung it to the side. He moved in and started sucking at the sensitive flesh of the older man’s neck, being careful not to leave any marks. He nipped and licked his way down Aaron’s neck and shoulder. His arms were wrapped around Aaron’s back and Spencer was scratching, leaving long red tendrils from shoulder to waist.

“Oh god, Spencer…don’t…don’t stop,” Aaron was giving into letting Spencer take control, he felt the need coming off of Spencer in waves of heat and passion. Spencer pulled back and pushed Aaron down on the bed, collapsing on top of his lover, taking his mouth in hot, rough kisses. He ran his tongue along Aaron’s jaw, biting pulling moans of pleasure from the man beneath him as he roughly ground his pelvis against the older mans. 

After a few minutes Spencer sat up and with shaking hands got Aaron’s belt and zipper undone, he moved off so that he could get the offending garments off his lover. Spencer wanted Aaron naked and he wanted it now. While standing he quickly undressed so that he was naked also. Finally with nothing between them Spencer moaned deeply as he felt flesh meeting flesh. He started to lick, bite and scratch his way down Aaron’s body and no spot was left untouched. From head to toe he claimed his lover with rough hands and even rougher mouth. By the time Spencer finally claimed his Unit Chiefs hard member Aaron was a writhing mess of want and need, just how Spencer wanted him.

When Spencer’s warm mouth finally descended on Aaron’s throbbing cock, he yelled, “Fuck, Spencer…god yes,” He started to buck up into Spencer’s very willing mouth, but Spencer pushed Aaron’s hips down, holding him there while he scraped teeth along the sensitive flesh, licking a stripe up the dark throbbing vein. Spencer started to bob his head enthusiastically up and down Aaron’s hard member, hallowing his cheeks and sucking hard. Aaron’s hands were fisted in Spencer’s hair and he was trying not to force Spencer, but god that mouth felt amazing to Aaron. When Spencer started to feel like Aaron was about to come, he slowed down, sat up and moved to the nightstand and grabbed the lube.

Aaron was just watching in anticipation, wanting Spencer to hurry, but knew that his lover needed to be in control for this night. Spencer slicked up his fingers and as he went back to sucking Aaron’s cock, he pushed one finger past the tight puckered hole. He heard his lover’s breath catch as he started to move the digit in and out, hooking the finger just so as he hit that spot that he knew drove Aaron crazy. By the time he added a third finger and was moving them in and out stretching the entrance, Aaron was begging with need.

“Spencer, please, now I need you now,” Spencer smiled down at his lover, loving the fact that he could reduce the always cool and in control Unit Chief down to this writing, begging mass of flesh beneath him. 

“Mmm, Aaron, so hot, so hot when you beg me,” He leaned down and claimed the older man’s mouth as he finally entered Aaron in one swift stroke. His lover cried out at feeling Spencer fill him all at once. At first Spencer wanted to take it slow, but as soon as he felt Aaron’s heat wrap around him he lost all control and started to move hard and fast. He grabbed Aaron by the back of the thighs and bent his legs up so that he could change the angle of his thrusts hitting Aaron’s prostate in just the right place.

“Fuuuuck,” Aaron cried out as Spencer fell on top and set a brutal pace, chasing the release he so desperately was seeking. Aaron thought he was going to lose it when he felt Spencer’s hand fist his cock and started pumping furiously.

“Come for me Aaron, I want to watch you come,” Aaron looked in his lover’s eyes and saw passion and love all mixed together. That alone drove Aaron over the edge and he cried out as he came in thick white streams all over Spencer’s hand and stomach.

Spencer felt Aaron’s muscles contract around his cock and he grabbed his lover’s hips and pumped a few more times before he finally felt his release as he spilled deep inside his lover’s ass. He collapsed in a sweaty, sticky mess on top of Aaron, but he didn’t care as strong arms came around him and held him there.

“God, Spencer…you’re going to kill me one of these days if we keep this up,” Aaron teased as he kissed the top of Spencer’s head.

Spencer wrapped his arms as best he could around Aaron, “Yeah, but it will be a nice way to go,” He teased back. After a few minutes Spencer sat up, “I’m going to go take a quick shower and clean up”.

Aaron was loathe to let him go, but he did because he wanted to do the same. As soon as they were both showered they made their way to the bed and collapsed under the sheets. 

Aaron pulled the genius to him, holding him tight, “Do you want to talk about it?”

Spencer was quiet for a time and Aaron thought the genius wasn’t going to answer but he finally did, “I just don’t understand Aaron. I mean I know he explained things, but he could’ve come back, or at least come to see me. He said he loved me but I just…” The deep emotions he had been holding back wanted to surface. 

“You just what Spence?”

“I just don’t understand”. He practically yelled anger lacing every word, “ I mean I look at you and Haley, even after everything you’ve been through you still make time for Jack. You show him as much as possible how much you love him. You didn’t abandon him, how could my father do that to me?” Then the tears he’d been holding back started to fall. 

Aaron took a deep breath and pulled Spencer in tighter, he didn’t really have the answers that Spencer was looking for but he thought he’d try. “I don’t know Spencer, and I know the explanation he gave will never be sufficient. It will never heal the hurt you feel for him walking out on you. I can only tell you that he does care. He kept up with you and he’s proud of you. Maybe you need to give him a chance to show it and only then will you be able to let go”.

“You’d never do that to Jack, would you?”

“Sometimes I feel like I am doing it to Jack”. He sighed deeply as his feelings of guilt about not being there as much as he’d like rose up. “I’m not there as much as I should be, but I’m trying. But, no Spencer I’d never completely abandon my son, but I’m not your father”. Hotch had a terrifying thought float across his mind, “God, I hope you don’t see me that way…” Hotch had a horrified expression on his face.

Spencer sat up and had a similar look, “Oh god no. That is not how I see you at all. I mean, yes you’ve been there for me and it can be construed that way, but yeah, I am not putting my father issues onto you. You’re not that much older”. Reid laughed when Hotch narrowed his eyes at him knowing how sensitive he could be about the age difference.

“Oh come on Aaron, you can’t possibly think that matters to me do you? I love you and our age difference is the least of my concerns”.

Aaron raised a brow, “Oh, you have concerns about us?” He said playfully.

Now it was Spencer who narrowed his eyes at the Unit Chief, “You know that’s not what I meant”.

Aaron rolled on top of Spencer, holding him down, “Oh really? What did you mean then Doctor Reid?” He leaned down and kissed the genius.

“I just mean in the everyday of our lives that the difference in our ages means nothing to me”. His mouth was captured in another kiss and he hummed appreciatively against Aaron’s lips. “I think I’m just going to shut-up now”.

“Mmm hmm, I think that’s a very good idea”. Aaron then proceeded to ravish the young genius turning the tables and taking him slowly, making love to him and letting him know just how much he loved him. After they were spent they quickly fell asleep curled into each other and yet again kept the nightmares at bay for at least one night.


End file.
